3 TIPS FOR WFH MOTHERS WITH BABIES DURING COVID TIME

 

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3 Tips for Working at Home with a Baby during the Pandemic

COVID-19 has drastically increased the number of parents with newborns working from home.

Being a new parent comes with its own challenges, but working from home during a pandemic

adds even more to an already daunting to-do list. 

While work may have structured hours, infants need time, attention, and care around the clock.

In this article, we will discuss three strategies parents of young children can use to improve their

productivity and maintain a healthy work-life balance.

Capitalize on Technology

As a working parent, technology is your new best friend. By now you’re already an expert at multitasking,

so take work on the go with apps like Google Docs. Listen to the Zoom meeting while on a stroller walk.

This not only gives you exercise and fresh air but stimulates the baby’s senses and promotes better sleep. 

Wireless earbuds eliminate the tangle and won’t be pulled out by the baby. Phone applications can help

you keep grocery lists, meetings, and other obligations all in one location. The assistance that technology

provides is invaluable to your productivity, almost like a personal assistant. 

Time Batch

With more people working from home this past year, time batching work has become a popular strategy. Time batching groups repetitive work into one time period and reduces the time spent switching from task to task. These tasks could include anything from sending emails and scheduling meetings to editing, managing budgets, or entering data.

Repeatedly switching tasks has a negative effect on productivity, and it can be tough to stay focused when you’re also taking care of a child. Every moment of work counts for busy parents, and this

method of work reduces wasted distractions and wasted time.

Schedule Around Downtime 

The most valuable time of the day is naptime. While it might be tempting to rest while your infant naps,

working through it will allow you to get much more work done. Turn on that baby monitor and take

advantage of the uninterrupted work time. You should also schedule important meetings during this time

in order to give them your undivided attention. 

While naptime is often the best time to work, you can still utilize other downtimes during the day. You may

notice post-meal tiredness in your child. These short, uninterrupted times of day are ideal for time

batching. Consider an indoor baby swing to help entertain and lull the child to sleep. The less time you have to spend in the rocking chair, the better. 

It’s difficult to achieve a good work-life balance, but it’s an achievable goal even for new parents. That said, it will take plenty of adapting and trying out new methods of working. If you’re used to

a 9 to 5 schedule, this may be the time to become more flexible. These tips will help you stay on

top of your work obligations while taking care of your child and managing any other responsibilities.

JP Morgan and Working Moms

As a working mom in India, I avidly read stories of the great fall of great financial institutions and figures all around the world.  Why? Well, the intricacies of the rise and fall of men is always interesting to read simply because it shows me that human nature never really changes. We are a hungry greedy roughneck species. No amount of education and globalization can really mask our caveman instincts. The Hugo Boss and Armani suits can’t really stop our greedy hands from trying to invest money that is not ours, into assets that are hugely suspect. Then, when all falls down, we go running to the big mama of the business of the world, ‘The Government’ to save us – capitalism be damned!!!

So how do these stories affect my daily life in any way? Well, it is because everything that I buy is an investment and some of these investments are dubious too. Like when I buy branded shoes for office wear. I am hoping the shoe will last a while and be able to bear the wear and tear of office working. But two months down the line, the buckle falls off and I am back at the mall looking for another pair to replace it.  But I should be outraged, right? I spent a good part of my hard-earned money on it and it barely lasted and it's not like I wore it every day. But its almost like I am relieved that the damn thing fell off because it gives me an excuse to buy another shoe. I mean back in my childhood, we bought Bata shoes and they never ever broke. One had to literally throw them away before we were given new ones.

But now, life is all about being able to buy and buy more and see and hear about other people buying and then do some more buying. So, can we really blame our financial wizards for wanting to wake up every day and go to work with the sole agenda of being able to play with their shareholders/investor’s money? What's to stop them? And more importantly, why would they want to stop? They want to live in bigger houses, drive sleeker cars, date prettier women or men, and spread the bonhomie of being a suit from Ivy League schools. And most of them succeed. JP Morgan may have laid a big fat egg in this quarter but does it mean that Jamie Dimon is going to stop doing what he does? Of course not. I mean he has the audacity to tell the government not to regulate, to spend money on lobbying for the same, and then he turns around and causes $2 billion to disappear!!
Then, he prepares for a carefully orchestrated apology on prime time TV. I mean the implications of this whole drama just takes my breath away. And is he really going to pay for these sins? Most likely not. In fact, the shareholders are not even demanding his head on a platter over this fiasco! Why? Because they don’t understand how the market works and they rather have a known Dimon than an unknown Dimon handle the finances. I mean they are probably thinking how much worse can it get? Six months down the line he will be forgotten and so will his actions and it will be business as usual. I mean close to home, what have we ever learned from the Satyam crisis?

So, like it or not people are going to try and steal our money, fool us into investing in stuff that we have no idea about and basically, rip us off on a daily basis. So, STOP BEING NAÏVE. The media can go ballistic over the whys and hows of this financial tragedy but honestly, by now we should not be surprised if so-called money-spinning experts  fall spectacularly on their faces and take the world down with them in flames!!

What we new-gen moms with independent money strings should do is, well for starters stop thinking that men know more about numbers than we do and more importantly teach our children how do manage their own money from day one. Give them money to go buy milk or junk food and ask them to do the actual transaction themselves. We also need to get the schools to teach children how not to just minus and plus but how to buy and sell with real money. The problem is that we tend to deprive our mites of any actual money in the formative years and then flood them with the same in the post-teen years and expect them to know the value. I don’t think that works.

And what should we as parents do to guard against bad investments and unscrupulous financial experts- nag them routinely, check your bank account regularly for transaction fees and READ THE SMALL PRINT ON ALL FINANCIAL documents. Then one day, may be in the near future we will be able to breed a  generation of human beings who want to give you super cool financial services rather than try and deprive you of your life savings because they know you are smarter than them !!!

Tiger Mom Is Not Lord Voldermont

Amy Chua opens up to BW’s Anjana Saproo about how her book is meant to be a satirical look at her parenting skills.

Amy Chua, the author of Battle Hymn Of The Tiger Mother, is probably the most reviled mom in the US today, after The Wall Street Journal published an excerpt from her book last year under the headline ‘Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior'.  The book, however, has found its sweet share of fans in India as well. Chinese moms worship the ground she walks on; well, sort of. The latter reaction again disturbs Chua. She fears they will take the book as a how-to-parent guide — and that was not the aim of her book anywhere. She claims this was meant to be a satirical look at her parenting skills and the situations that unfolded thereafter but nobody really gets that. Chua opens up to BW's Anjana Saproo and tries to put the record straight.
 
Why did you write the book?
I wrote the book in a moment of crisis when my 13-year-old daughter Lulu rebelled against my strict parenting. The book is very much misunderstood by people who don't read it. I think 90 percent of the people writing about it have not read the entire book, but only the excerpt published by The Wall Street Journal. 
 
But you find a lot of sympathy among the Indian audiences?
Oh, it has been amazing.  I mean, I did not know much about Indian parenting so I was surprised. I received many supportive e-mails from Indian audiences. Also, the crowds at the festival were very supportive and most importantly, they got the humour of the book. That it so great instead of having people reading the book literally and reacting. It is supposed to be satirical. At least the Indians get it.

Before the book was published, my daughters told me — Mom! no one is going to read it, it is too weird. So, I left my e-mail address on it to make it very public. I thought that people would understand the book to be more literary.  I meant it to be a little more complex.
 Amy Chua, the author of Battle Hymn Of The Tiger Mother, is probably the most reviled mom in the US today after The Wall Street Journal published an excerpt from her book last year under the headline ‘Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior'.  The book, however, has found its sweet share of fans in India as well. Chinese moms worship the ground she walks on; well, sort of. The latter reaction again disturbs Chua. She fears they will take the book as a how-to-parent guide — and that was not the aim of her book anywhere. She claims this was meant to be a satirical look at her parenting skills and the situations that unfolded thereafter but nobody really gets that. Chua opens up to BW's Anjana Saproo and tries to put the record straight.

Do you think Indians identify with it because our parenting is similar to that of the Chinese?
Yes. I learned this. Indian students in America are at the top. They do better than even the Chinese students and I am always telling my daughters the same.  So, of course, there has to be a pattern of parenting similar to mine because I know what it takes to make it to the top.  Also, Indian students are well-adjusted. You have to understand that I raised my children in America. And the American system already promotes creativity, independence, irreverence, play dates, sleepovers talking, etc. In that context, for me to follow a traditional pattern of parenting is my way of striking the balance.

But in China, the education system is way too authoritarian, too strict, too much rote learning, and does not encourage thinking out of the box. I do not propagate Tiger parenting there. If I were in China I would, rather, say that children need more freedom, more choice. My book gives a different message depending on whether you are a parent in the East or a parent in the West.
 
Do you think the Americans were outraged because you turned the mirror on their parenting skills and forced them to think about it?
Yes. I have often been wondering about the very strong reaction I got. People would ask —do you care more about the child's success than her happiness? And I am like — it is a no-brainer. I mean if I had to choose between success and happiness, then, of course, I would choose happiness. But the question here is how do you raise children who can later grow to become happy adults. I do not know the right answer to it, which is very complex. And America has a very high rate of teen depression, teen anxiety, teenage substance abuse, and one of the highest rates of teen pregnancies, among developed countries. So, that is not a recipe for happiness either.

The book is openly self-incriminating. For me, the proof is in the pudding. If you look at my girls they are well-adjusted, successful, and yes— happy too. They are vibrant, independent, funny, generous girls. The point I am trying to make is that there are many ways to bring up happy and strong kids. Nobody knows the internal workings of the family. And I am fascist and very hard on myself. And I am not a fascist simply because a fascist is a person who does not take any criticism. The book, itself, is 90 percent self-criticism.

Do you read Indian writers?
I love Indian writers. A Suitable Boy is one of my favourites. The God of Small Things by Arundhati Roy is another. I also like Jhumpa Lahiri. I recently read The Interpreter of Maladies.

What is next?
Definitely not another parenting book after this. I am planning to go back to academics.

“The Obamas Are A Great American Story”

David Remnick, the editor of The New Yorker and author of The Bridge: The Life and Rise of Barack Obama is a restless soul. He claims he never vacations easy and prefers interactions at places such as the Jaipur Literary Festival, which "are a kick in the butt". BW's Anjana Saproo chats up with him on his life as an editor, his favourite Indian writer and a lot more.
 

David Remnick, the editor of The New Yorker and author of The Bridge: The Life and Rise of Barack Obama is a restless soul. He claims he never vacations easy and prefers interactions at places such as the Jaipur Literary Festival, which "are a kick in the butt". BW's Anjana Saproo chats up with him on his life as an editor, his favourite Indian writer and a lot more.
 

How has the Indian experience been for you?
I was invited and I have not been to India since I was 22 years old, and that was not exactly yesterday. I am particularly interested in meeting Indian writers — the ones that I have heard about and also the ones that I have only vaguely heard about. Actually, I can meet the other authors anywhere else — I do not have to come to India to meet them.
 
How do you juggle the role of an editor, journalist and author?
Well, my main job is being the editor of the magazine. Most of the time is taken up by that and my family. I rarely do reporting nowadays. About 6 weeks ago, I went to Moscow, stayed there for about nine days, and wrote a story rather quickly (It is on the web) and it came out at the time the demonstrations were starting. So for me, that is rare, and doing something like coming to a literature fest is even rarer. But for me, this is much more interesting than going on a vacation. I do not vacation easily, I prefer such kind of interactions. I mean I am sitting here and looking at a beautiful parrot behind you. And where else would my conversation be interrupted by a beautiful cow?
 
Why the Obamas?
Because they are a great American story; and I am interested in race. I did a book on the subject before. It is the central drama of American life in many ways. There is nothing contrived about it. You know this is a guy whose name rhymes with the most despised figure in modern American imagination. He is black and came out of nowhere, and went on to become the President of America. That, to my mind, is a good story.
 
Why are the Americans now disillusioned with Obama?
His personal story becomes a lot less interesting once he becomes the President because the stakes get higher. Governance is not about romance and narratives; it is about hard decisions on war and peace, and dollars and cents, and many other things. Hence the disappointment.
 
Who is your favourite Indian writer?
I am rereading Midnight's Children, and it is an astonishing book. It vibrates with life in so many different directions. And just now I was in the bookstore and saw that there were so many books that I had heard of but had not read. If anything, this festival has been a kick in the butt for me as far as my reading is concerned. I mean we all have shelves full of books that we have not read!

You know we publish a fair number of books by Indian writers and immigrant Indian writers, the most famous being, of course, Jhumpa Lahiri. I feel that she was lucky in one other way — 9 times out of ten when a movie gets done based on a novel, the only good thing about it is the money. But I thought that The Namesake was rather well-made.
 
What are your thoughts on e-books?
I care more about the future of reading. If people are reading, they are availing themselves of countless worlds. But if you do not read you do not. If you are reading e-book as opposed to the printed version I do not mind. I know the choice to read an e-book depends a lot on age and interest — and I get the advantages and disadvantages of both. But if you want to read The New Yorker on your iPad or in print, it is to my advantage, I appreciate the platform.

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Yes I am!!

It is confirmed now - all the hours my mother spent in the puja room fretting over our lack of religious fervour has borne fruit. God got fed up and granted her hippy children the power of religious bond, though subtly and quite late in the day. I realised yesterday evening standing among a melee of  Bengalis in CR park, with the strains of Rabindra Sangeet wafting in the air along with the smell of delicious egg rolls, that this is who I am. A hardcore non-veg Bangali!! The pursuit of happiness in a soul-sucking city like Delhi has not been able to kill my Bengalipana. The atmosphere in CR Park actually transports me back to my good old Cal days. We used to go pandal hopping after 10pm and every Durga Mata murti and intricate lighting arrangements just fascinated us.

The CR park pujas do not have that kind of glamour - but what they lack in that department they make up with a crowd that is actually holding up the Bengali tradition lock, stock and barrel. They have no fear of long queues both outside the pandals and in front of the food stalls. They dance to the dhaker bajna and just revel in the fact that they are Bengalis. For a brief moment, I feel sad that Shayan will probably have no clue what I am talking about - but then I turn around and see him standing in front of Matadi with his hands closed in prayer and eyes shut tightly. There is hope yet!!

Will be going to the GK and Noida pujas in the coming days. Hopefully will have more to share. Do check out the Shib Mandirer puja in CR - the white idol just takes one's breath away.

Am I Still a Bengali?

For all those following my gym trials - well I am still struggling with inertia and leachy men but the good news is that the weight is definitely going down.

On a completely different note, I just realised with a jolt the other day that my children are getting cut off from the culture that I grew up in. And although we were pretty secular(My dad went to the Brahmo Samaj and Mom was the quintessential hindu rajmata) my brother and I were pretty iffy about our religious inclinations. We both prayed fervently for 10 secs on the day of the examinations and we quite rightly felt that we had done our Godly duty.

Cut to the present. My son is 6 and my daughter is 4. The former follows the dad to the tee- so he can spout the Gayatri mantra and seems to like having a chat with God before he brushes his teeth in the morning. He knows that Diwali means crackers galore and any other festival means that he gets new clothes and we eat like there is no tomorrow. But that's not all of it, is it?

So this Durga Puja I have decided to (a.) Tell him the story of Durga Mata in the simplest Hinglish possible. (b.) Drag him to the pandals at aarti time and try and put the fear of the lady goddess in him. Shreya is still too small to appreciate all these efforts of mine,  but I am sure the sweet prasad will please her to no end.

So to all the Bengali gals who have married into other cultures hoist high the flag of the Bengal Spirit minus all the negativity, with great pride!!!

Pujor Hawa laga!

Day 3 and 4 - Losing 40 kilos and Definitely Losing my Mind

Day 3

Went to the gym pumped to the core. Had a day's rest.  I made a resolution when I got onto the walking escalator - Tune out the world, tune into the music and just walk. Its easier said than done - but I needed to remain positive.
Pinky the trainer/tyrant was in full form. 3-minute walk, 3-minute running - she barked. Before I knew it I had spent 20 minutes on the treadmill. When I later lay down on the mat, I actually felt hot air coming out of my ears. I am never eating junk food again, I promised myself fiercely. But there were more sinful tortures awaiting me outside the gym. 

It was a holiday for the kids, so we ended up going out and landed in Nirula's. There began my gastronomic torture- the Shammi kebab on the visual menu was calling out to me saying, 'Eat me, I am delicious.' The chocolate sundae was saying, 'I am delicious-how can you resist me?' God! The food was talking to me. I was on the edge of hysteria. Then suddenly the phone rings. Its the exercise mafia moll. She of course does not believe in social niceties. "Madam," she yells, "Khane pe control!!" Is she phone stalking me? Her call brings me back from food heaven's door. I grab the kids, jump into the car, and drive to Top Breads. There I eat salad and corn croissant-whatever that is. I mean I don't even eat corn, let alone corn stuffed croissants !!

Two learnings- you don't need to starve if you go to the gym- eat home food, avoid junk and cold drinks, and you are safe.
If you are temtped, just close your eyes and think of all the sweat you shed, in the gym. It will kill all food urges.

Day 4

Today was a bad day. Woke up with a severe back ache.  Pinky was unsympathetic. "Exercise kar lo, baad mein thik kar doengee." But I was really tired and actuually dragged myself through the floor exercises. But she kept her word. After, the push ups on the mat, she actually massaged my back properly. I felt much better.

In between all this sourness and pain, some local stud switched the music to some romantic Sunil Dutt and Sadhana songs. My BP rose by several notches. I mean, we are exercising man- we need pumping music, not whiskeywaley gane. He was probably trying to impress someone in the gym or was a majnu!! The head trainer, who is quite petrified of me, put on FM hurriedly. Then he walked up to me and said, "Madam, close mouth and exercise." Ok boss, I get it, breathe in and out through my nose. Open mouths are not wanted here!!

One learning: Don't be scared about falling off the wagon. You will.  But once you do, you have to pick yourself up and soldier on. Dar ke agaey jeet hai!!!